A520.6.3.RB_BrianneGowens_Conflict Resolution

First, view the video below. Then use your blog to describe an example of a successful conflict resolution that you have either witnessed or participated in. What was the conflict? What role did you play? Who were the other participants in the negotiation? Knowing what you know now, how might you have changed your actions or improved the solution?

There is no doubt that people have mixed feelings about conflict. To many, the word “conflict” represents anger and hostility. For these individuals, thoughts of conflict may initiate feelings of fear and dread. Other individuals see conflict as an opportunity to collaborate, learn, and discover new perspectives. The tension between intellectual acceptance of conflict and emotional rejection of it further complicates the subject (Whetton & Cameron, 2016).  

All of us have undoubtedly experienced some type of conflict in our lives. In some cases, this conflict presents itself in the home environment and in others it is generated in the workplace. I was recently faced with conflict at work and it caused me to struggle more than I ever have, despite many years in this career. Just over one year ago, I started a new job within my company. Previously, I negotiated contracts supporting the sale of aftermarket aerospace services. These services included things like pilot training, airplane software, interior configuration retrofits, and maintenance training. After spending three years on this type of contracting, I was promoted to a new organization to contract for the sale of commercial aircraft. I knew this job role would bring with it more stress but was excited to join a more elite team and was ready for the increased responsibility.

What I wasn’t prepared for was the difficult personality I would encounter in my new managing director. My new director had a reputation for being tough, but I thought I would get along with her just fine as long as I worked hard and showed my dedication to the organization. I was wrong. I got the feeling that Ann just didn’t like me, no matter what I tried to do to change her impression. After several months of trying to change her mind, I talked to another executive in my organization and was told that the conflict between us was likely caused by personal differences. These personal differences centered around the fact that I had children and a healthy marriage and was able to manage that with a very strong career focus at a young age. There was nothing I could do to change this situation as it appeared that incompatible personal values caused her to push against me (Whetton & Cameron, 2016).

The conflict between Ann and I caused environmentally induced stress, which only further increased the conflict between us (Whetton & Cameron, 2016). I began to lose my confidence in negotiations and was timid around her, which caused her to believe I wasn’t as strong as I knew I could be. I started dreading work and as a result I lost the dedication to it that I normally felt. I didn’t talk to Ann directly because I had already been told that our issue was one that I simply couldn’t fix. Instead, I sat at my desk in fear that Ann would come by and bark at me; I was miserable!

After six months in the new role, I had to do something as the tension between us was getting unbearable. Ury (2010) suggested that when tempers rise, you must “hide the poison arrows” and dedicate time to sit down and talk. This is exactly what I did. I set up a one-hour long session with Ann to explain my feelings and try to move forward. My role in this conversation was the initiator, which meant that I had to take ownership of my own feelings and describe the specific behaviors that were causing me to feel badly when dealing with Ann (Whetton & Cameron, 2016). I explained to Ann that the tension between us was causing me to lose focus on my work, which was bad for both of us.

I forgot that it’s easy to lose sight of the other person’s perspective when you are involved in a conflict and the conversation with Ann helped remind me that there are two sides to every story. Sometimes we fill in the blanks on what we think is happening instead of actually asking others this question directly. To address our conflict, I ignored the you vs. me dynamic and chose instead to take the third side. As a result, I was able to look at the dynamic between Ann and I from the balcony and find a clearer path towards resolving our issues (Ury, 2010). Ann explained to me that she did not feel any personal dislike for me and in fact she thought I was doing a great job in my new role. She explained that she has a very tough personality and sometimes a cold exterior and that may cause people to think she doesn’t like them, but this couldn’t be further from the truth. Ann suggested that we continue to meet at least once every two weeks to talk about how my role was going, so I set up bi-weekly one-on-ones moving forward.

Knowing what I know now, I would have had a discussion with Ann much earlier. Because I kept my feelings internal and failed to see her perspective, I lived in misery for six months and may have even made things worse. Sabern(n.d.) reminded people that the worst thing we can do is assume we know something instead of asking: “don’t assume… ask! You’ll be amazed at what you can learn.”

Dealing with conflict isn’t easy, but it’s possible if we can find a way to walk side by side in a common direction (Ury, 2010). “It’s not easy, but it’s possible. It simply depends on us” (Ury, 2010).

References

Saber, B. (n.d.) Don’t assume..ask! Asking Matters. Retrieved from https://askingmatters.com/dont-assume-ask/

Ury, W. (2010, December). The walk from “no” to “yes” [Video file]. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hc6yi_FtoNo

Whetton, D. A. & Cameron, K. S. (2016). Developing management skills,
        9th ed. Boston, MA: Pearson.

A520.5.3.RB_BrianneGowens_What Makes Us Feel Good About Work?

Dan Ariely outlined what motivates us to work is a sense of purpose. Reflect on what motivates you at work and what gives you a sense of purpose. Why do you do what you do? What do you hope to achieve through your work? In considering how you are motivated, how can you discover not only your own personal fulfillment but that of your followers?

Leaders today seem to have a very simplistic view of exactly why people are motivated to do what they do (Ariely, 2013). The lesson this week separated motivators that many identify to be traditional, like salary, from those that are less tangible, like satisfaction and value. Still, to suggest that motivation and financial compensation are completely unrelated is a stretch. Ariely (2013) acknowledged that some level of motivation certainly comes from compensation. I would further argue that financial motivators help attract individuals to their initial work, but non-financial motivators are what keep them there. Ladimeji (2015) shared a study confirming that “a competitive pay rate is clearly a great way to attract top talent,” but motivation levels don’t increase at the same rate as pay levels. The team at Salary.com (2018) added that one of the best things employers can do to retain good employees is to praise them for a job well done.

One key motivator for employees is driven by the need to feel as if we’ve achieved something - this is a huge motivator for me as well. Whetton & Cameron (2016) described the “need for achievement” as an individual’s internal drive to meet some established standard of excellence. For me, this translates into a level of competition that drives a need to determine the standard level of performance and then find a way to exceed that standard. I am motivated by setting a goal and achieving it, but more importantly, by having a leader within my organization acknowledge that I’ve achieved it. This acknowledgement can come in the form of an email, a pat on the back, or a “good job” in front of team members during our weekly staff meeting. An obvious de-motivator for me is accomplishing something significant, but being completely ignored. It seems this is a de-motivator for others as well. In his 2013 TED Talk, Aridly highlighted that ignoring someone’s performance is just as bad as taking their work and shedding it right in front of their faces.

I do what I do because it is very challenging, which makes me feel even more proud of myself when I achieve something. The value that people find in the work they do is based on the level of connection each person makes with their work (Aridly, 2013). I find value in my work because I happen to be doing something that I am passionate about. I have always loved to write, both creatively and professionally. This love led me to study the arts in college and eventually obtain a Bachelor’s degree in English – Writing and Rhetoric. During college, I started an internship with an engineering, procurement, and construction company within the Contracts Organization. Immediately, I found a way to tie my love for writing with the task of drafting contractual language. Now, 14 years later, I am still employed in the contracts field and I have the opportunity to craft and then negotiate business language almost every day. I have a very personal connection to my work and this is why I do what I do.

Through my work, I hope to do two major things. First, I hope to display a level of passion and motivation that attracts others to the Contracts organization. Second, I hope to reduce the level of risk to my company through skilled writing along with a perpetual increase in technical knowledge about the products and services we sell at my company.

As I fulfill these two goals in my career, I gain greater insight into how I am personally motivated. In discovering how I am motivated, I hope to increase my level of personal fulfillment. One of the key steps that must be taken to achieve this personal fulfillment is to communicate with my leadership regarding my own career goals. I believe leaders are challenged because they have such a diverse team of personalities, backgrounds, and personal motivators. I can help my own leaders by communicating clearly about what I need from them in order to stay motivated. Primarily, I must share the fact that I need timely, accurate, and frequent feedback on my performance. Feedback is always a good thing, but Whetton & Cameron (2016) highlighted how important it is to receive feedback and rewards in a timely manner: “the longer the delay in the administration of rewards, the less reinforcement value they have” (p. 285).

With this knowledge, I hope to be a better source of motivation for my followers. A study by Deloitte (2017) found that only 13% of people are actually passionate about their jobs. This is a problem! As a leader, it’s important to get to know your followers so you can find out what drives them both personally and professionally. By identifying this drive in people, I will be better at assigning tasks that align with the skills and passions of followers. I expect that this alignment will help individuals establish a greater sense of motivation about the jobs they do, cementing their value within the organization

References

Aridly, D. (2013, April). What makes us feel good about our work? [Video file]. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5aH2Ppjpcho

Deloitte. (2017). Only 13 percent of the US workforce is passionate about their jobs. Retrieved from https://www.prnewswire.com/news-releases/deloitte-study-only-13-percent-of-the-us-workforce-is-passionate-about-their-jobs-300469952.html

Ladimeji, K. (2015). How much does pay level affect motivation? Recruiter. Retrieved from https://www.recruiter.com/i/how-much-does-pay-level-affect-motivation/

Salary.com. 5 simple ways to motivate employees. Retrieved February 10, 2018 from https://business.salary.com/5-simple-ways-to-motivate-employees/

Whetton, D. A. & Cameron, K. S. (2016). Developing management skills,

        9th ed. Boston, MA: Pearson.

A520.4.3.RB_Brianne Gowens_Supportive Communication

Reflect on the eight attributes of supportive communication and detail how you might apply those over the next 30 days in your job to avoid some of the problems associated with this communication. 

In a very blunt email by the Chief Executive Officer (CEO) at a technology company named Cerna, managers were reprimanded for the appearance that they were not spending enough time in the office. The number of hours an individual spends at work can be a sensitive topic. Executive leaders are often driven to even longer hours, leading them to look down on anyone who isn’t working as much as they are. Yet employees at all levels of the organization feel as if they already spend too many hours in the office. On top of all of this, companies have a habit of rewarding the employees who come in first and leave last, even while advertising their support of a healthy work-life balance through posters on the wall. The time spent at a physical work location brings with it the perception that someone is more committed than their neighbor who may be working remotely. Even if this is a false perception, its existence is a reality.

Although time keeping is a sensitive issue, there are several effective ways to address it without creating unnecessary conflict and hard feelings. There are some employees in my workplace who don’t show up at their desks as frequently as they should, which means that myself (and likely many others) are harboring the same type of thoughts as the Cerna CEO. Even if the absent workers are doing just as much work as those in the office, it is important for teams to see each other periodically in order to maximize group effectiveness. “When a single team member works remotely, they don’t have an equal opportunity to build the same kind of relationships as members of the team who see each other every day” (Moore, 2017).

In order to address a problem employee in my workplace over the next thirty days, I plan to approach the conversation in a way that enables productive discussion and strengths relationships. To begin, it’s important to take the communication out of cyberspace and actually look someone in the eyes. “The ability to effectively communicate face to face is the characteristic judged by managers to be most critical in determining promotability” (Whetton and Cameron, 2016, p. 191). In the highly technological world we live in today, it’s tempting to let email deliver the message, but the quality of communication plunders when this approach is chosen.

Over the next thirty days, I plan to practice each of Whetton and Cameron’s (2016) eight attributes of supportive communication. First, I’ll start with properly describing the problem, but doing so in a way that doesn’t appear to judge or evaluate the behavior of the employee. I will also merge this with attribute eight, which encourages supportive listening and asking for feedback from the other person. I will start this conversation with my teammate by stating something like: “Jane, I’ve noticed that you only spend one day each week in the office, which makes me concerned that you’re not getting to benefit from the interaction with other team members. How would you feel about coming into the office at least three days per week?”

Next, it will be important for me to communicate in a way that matches my feelings, which means avoiding the instinct to sugar-coat the message to reduce potential conflict. This means I should say: “It’s unfair for me to treat you differently than team,” instead of showing incongruence. An incongruent statement might make it sounds as if I’m just delivering a message on behalf of someone else in an attempt to deflect conflict. This is not supportive communication and is less effective than being honest about the actual issue.

With congruence comes the need to keep things focused on the problem and use specifics (Whetton & Cameron, 2016). If I said something like “Jane, you don’t work as hard as everyone else,” this would be person-oriented messaging. Instead, I could say “Jane, policy requires all employees to be in the office at least three days per week.” By rewording the statement, it becomes both problem-oriented and specific, while addressing the same issue.

Even though other team members have voiced their frustration over Jane’s absence, it’s important that I take responsibility as the one delivering the message. To do this, I have to avoid saying that others have asked me to talk to Jane and instead say that I am addressing the situation as a result of my own thoughts and feelings.

As the conversation progresses, there should be opportunity for back and forth dialogue, which is where speaking with validation and conjunction are important. In order to facilitate interaction, I would consider saying something like “do you have any ideas on how else we could meet the policy but also give you the flexibility you need to manage your workload?” This may provide an opportunity to further expand on the problem with conjunctive communication: “as a follow up to my earlier statement, it’s also important that the team and I can reach you when you’re working remotely, but I have had trouble getting through on your mobile when you’re not in the office.” Conjunctive communication enables individuals to address multiple aspects of an issue in a single conversation.

Through the use of Whetton & Cameron’s (2016) eight attributes of supportive communication, the CEO from Cerna could have avoided the negative response he likely received from followers. Face-to-face, two-way communication is an essential starting point on the path towards achieving effective communication. On top of this, use of a friendly tone, a smile, and relaxed posture can create a more inviting atmosphere and further enable positive interpersonal relationships (Doyle, 2017).

References

Doyle, A. (2017). Communication skills for workplace success. The Balance. Retrieved from https://www.thebalance.com/communication-skills-list-2063779

Moore, S. (2017). Remote workers don’t have to be your team’s black sheep. Fortune. Retrieved from http://fortune.com/2017/05/17/leadership-career-advice-working-remotely-remote-workers-home-telecommuting/

Whetton, D. A. & Cameron, K. S. (2016). Developing management skills, 9th ed. Boston, MA: Pearson.