I have been working in the field of contracts for over thirteen years and as I reflected on this question, I realized the real-word experiences that stand out for me most are the ones that included confrontation. This confrontation usually came in the form of a face to face contractual negotiation with a supplier or a customer, and sometimes they included internal negotiations as well. Prior to face to face negotiations, I do a lot of preparing and strategizing. This process of preparing and then executing on a strategy has been extremely educational and instructional for me.
Although George discussed the importance of reflecting verbally, I find that my best reflection is done in writing (George, 2012). When I’ve had a difficult conversation or a tough negotiation, I tend to go straight to my computer and summarize the situation in an email. Sometimes I send the email to a colleague and sometimes I don’t, but the process of re-living the experience and documenting it helps me in two ways. First, it helps me vent. When I’ve been in a confrontation, I have a lot of frustration that builds up. I am very emotionally connected to my work, so if I feel that things didn’t go exactly as planned, I can get very tense. Summarizing the situation helps relieve that tension. The second way this helps me is the organizational aspect of it. I tend to like things organized and clearly documented, so I find it soothing to spill my thoughts in an email for the purposes of record keeping. Northouse (2016) stated that authentic leadership is often nurtured and developed throughout the leader’s lifetime, and reflecting via written notes is a form of nurturing for me.
Most of my reflection is done internally, but I do have a couple of colleagues that I can receive honest feedback from. There is one person in particular who used to work in my group but moved out of my group approximately one year ago. I feel most comfortable receiving feedback from him because he’s removed from my chain of command. Even though he’s removed, he has a basic knowledge of my experiences because he used to be in my group.
I have found that I get the most honest feedback if I request it off-premise. For example, if I have these discussions with my colleagues during lunch or after work at a happy hour, they seem to be more open to speaking candidly. Alternatively, if we are eating in the lunchroom or chatting at our desks, feedback tends to be more vague. I think the obvious explanation for this is the worry that others may hear our discussions. Sometimes people are even concerned with the perception that comes with two people talking quietly to each other. There may be an automatic assumption that the two are discussing something negative about other colleagues or about the organization.
My methods of reflecting and seeking feedback have certainly impacted my leadership abilities. I believe the practice of reflecting via written notes and emails has actually helped me stand out from my peers. I recently had to travel oversees for a meeting with one of our customers and each day after the meeting, I sent comprehensive notes to my leadership team. These notes included summaries of the conversations, my general impressions of the meetings, and action items for all parties. Another colleague of mine traveled around the same time and did not send these notes. When each of us had returned from our trips, two managers commended me for taking the time to send these notes, and one manager even recognized me in our staff meeting for being so thorough. This practice has helped me gain self-efficacy, which includes the ability to recognize situations that have an outcome valued by an individual (Helland & Winston, 2005).
This method of reflecting was calming for me, but it has also helped me recognize a behavior that other leaders find valuable to the organization. Behavior, passion, consistency, and connectedness are all characteristics highlighted by George as dimensions of authentic leadership (Northouse, 2016). Each of these four characteristics are also highlighted with the habit I have created of reflecting with comprehensive notes.
References
George, B. (2012, Nov.). Harvard's Bill George: Inner Work for Authentic Leadership [Video file]. Retrieved from https://youtu.be/SmPu2LQ84ts
Helland, M. R., and Winston, B. E. (2005). Towards a Deeper Understanding of Hope and Leadership. Journal of Leadership & Organizational Studies, 12(2), 42-54.
Northouse, P. G. (2016). Leadership: Theory and practice (7th ed.). Thousand Oaks, California: Sage Publishing.
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